"Do You See It?" "See What?" "A Sparkle."

My mother says my eyes sparkle when I'm happy.  She also says it's easy to tell when I'm not happy because the sparkle is gone.  I don't know if that's true or if it's just her perspective, but I suspect it is because other people have made similar comments.

For instance, one time in Bible School last year, I walked into class tired and grumpy.  I didn't really do anything different, I just said good morning to everyone (with a little less enthusiam than normally), and sat down to listen to my iPod.  It wasn't that I never did that... just not often, but it wasn't super abnormal.  At least not to me.  However, to the two boys in the back row, something wasn't aright.  The younger one looked at me and said, "What's wrong?" I, of course, said, "Nothing."  He came right back with, "Something's up.  You're not happy.  Where's your joy?"

That hit me hard.  It wasn't just a 'where's your God-given good attitude' kind of question.. he was wondering what happened to dampen me, to out my light, as it were.  It hit me because there wasn't really a reason.. I was just all harumphed.  [Please, don't try to figure that out.  There isn't a good explanation.]

I realized that there was a significant lack of reasons for being in the attitude I was in... my classmate showed me, in the span of one sentence, that attitude is everything and that I have control over it.  The question to me wasn't so much about where the joy was - I knew it still resided within me.  It was more about why I was choosing not to show it and to let my bad, but largely unbased, mood rule my morning.

It didn't seem natural that people should so easily read me.  However, as I've learned to pay more attention, I'm finding it's not nearly as weird... or as hard... as it would at first seem.  One of my best friends is a good example.. and don't be creeped out, I don't stalk him.  I just spend a lot of time with him. :)  Anyways, when said friend is happy, the skin on his face shines with an almost pinkish glow, and his eyes are clear.  However, when angry, it's as if someone took some smoke, or something similar, and rubbed it in (if that was possible).. you may have heard the expression "clouded over"?  Well, I've seen it live.  His face clouds over.  The skin gets pale and darker, and looks almost pasty, similar to the consistancy of cookie dough.  His eyes dull and get a red tinge as if he was tired.  It's crazy.  I can always tell when he's in less than a good mood by his face... even if I don't know exactly why.  I suppose it's similar with my own person.

It used to bother me - a lot - that people could read my moods so easily.  It's hard to fake being happy when you're upset, or vice versa, or whatever you want, really, when people can tell how you're feeling by your body or the way you carry yourself.

However, ever since I started my job, I've realized that this is not something to be annoyed by.  Better than that, my mood, and however my body chooses to communicate it - whether by starry eyes or uplifted step -  is a tool.  It's a tool to teach and encourage others to be happier themselves.

You see, if people can tell that I'm happy, natural law says they should in turn be happier, even if it's only a little.  Think about it.  If you see someone laughing and enjoying themselves, you smile a little more inside, even if you're having a horrible day.  Because joy creates joy, and it's natural to feel a little better when you see someone else having a great time.

So, whatever if my eyes sparkle.  If that proves that I'm happy, bring it on.  They'd better be sparkling, because if they aren't, I'm not having a good time and enjoying my life.  And I don't want that.  I'd rather be happy, eyes sparkling or not, I don't care.  But since they apparently do, I'll embrace it. And I'll sparkle my way into others' hearts and lives, throwing out sparkly eye pixie dust and hopefully making their eyes a little more sparkly too.

What about you?  What would you rather communicate with your body?  It's not hard to tell whether most people are happy or not... what do you want them to see?  More importantly, what do you want to feel?

Think about it.  Do you sparkle?